Think About Your Life:

Treatment

Going in and out of doctor's offices, lying on radiation tables, and sitting in chemo chairs can all be dehumanizing experiences. You feel sick, your medical team may not know you, and you may be having a hard time doing the things you want to do because of side effects, but once you settle into your routine the rhythm of cancer becomes almost normal.

Yeah, you are still afraid, but life goes on around you, and you can find resilience in this experience.

Treatment is the time to marshal your advocates and allies, and tell them clearly, "this is what I need right now." Most people want to help, they are often just at a loss as to how to help you. It's your job to tell them clearly what you need and don't need. Click here for a conversation about using tools during treatment.

Try if you want to give others a picture of your life and the support you need now (see Eleanor's example for ideas).

Try to figure out how to cope, take action and/or get help. Possible issues may include:

• Side effects from treatment are awful
• I'm tired all the time
• I don't have enough help
• Just because I look ok, doesn't mean I am

Try if you want people to know better how to support you on bad days and how to help you through cancer treatment. Possible issues may include:

• I want people to pick-up on my moods and needs so I don't have to feel like I am always asking for help
• I am inundated with people wanting to help
• I don't know how to say "NO" to friends and family
• I dont know how to communicate to friends and family about my disease

Try to work through specific concerns. Possible issues may include:

• I don't know how I'm going to pay for treatment
• What do I tell my boss? How do I manage work through treatment?

Try when you are struggling emotionally through treatment. Possible issues may include:

• I don't know how to communicate to friends and family about my disease
• I am terrified of dying
• I feel depressed, angry, scared (also consider professional counseling support)

Treatment for cancer can take many forms - from surgery to chemo and/or radiation; these are the most common treatments. This is a time when co-survivors my do more hands-on support such as taking care of children, cooking/delivering meals and/or going to treatment sessions.

Your loved one may experience difficult side effects, blue days, and a wide range of emotions. The tool will be helpful for you to know what a good day and bad day looks like for the person you are supporting.

When you know this information, you can take steps to make days better rather than worse.